Go!ng To Meow?
April 4th, 2008 by Empress Nightshade
I know that I’m about to scratch all in the soil and perhaps run into a thorn or two, but I just have to write this….
You want to get to know me better, correct? Well, the only way for you to do that is for me to reveal a few things. Not all at once, but slowly — one at a time. And this time reveals……I HATE CATS!
There. I’ve said it. It’s out in the open. Actually, the word ‘hate’ is a strong one, so let me rephrase that. I strongly dislike cats very, very, very, very much.
Cats are lazy bums who sleep all day, lick their fur and poop in a plastic tray. They’re sneaky little boogers who come around when you’re busy, demand attention while you’re on the phone and meow endlessly when you’re trying to sleep. If my good friend knew I felt this way, it would kill her. She’s a ‘cat lady’ with eight cats or “kids” as she calls them.
I suppose this dislike came from the fact that not only do the sicks one show up on my doorstep from time to time, but as a kid the three we had all died horrible deaths. (NO! I had nothing to do with it)
Are you a cat-lover or dis-liker? What is it exactly that a cat does for you?
“Cats are lazy bums who sleep all day, lick their fur and poop in a plastic tray.”
Hell.
Replace the word “fur” with “balls” and I could be a cat.
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moooooog, if I told you I was thinking about you when I wrote that, would you be insulted?
Empress Nightshade’s last blog post..The Flintstones Pushed Drugs and Tobacco
ha ha mooog - sorry to hear you’re not a cat person Empress’ we have 5 in our house
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Hey, Purple….
Why are you sorry?
Empress Nightshade’s last blog post..The Flintstones Pushed Drugs and Tobacco
sorry that you don’t like cats - they’re quite theraputic when they’re asleep on your lap, purring away whilst you type on blogs (or design websites).
bit of a pain when they mess in the house or both original cats have litters at the same time - once the kittens were walking, i felt like i tip-toed around the house for a month.
There are some pictures of the kittens on Mandy’s art website - a daily picture diary and some funny captions after work colleagues kept asking for pictures of the little fluff balls….
here’s the link: http://www.purple13.co.uk/kitten/
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Sorry that you had such a bad early experience with three cats dying on you too! Maybe you should give a kitty cat another try and see just how lovable they can be!
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Sweetie,
I’ve tried several of them since I’ve been an adult. In fact, this last one I swear was the spawn of satan. I’ve gotten them for my son because he loves them so. But, for some STRANGE reason, they seem to gravitate towards me. Go figure…
Empress Nightshade’s last blog post..I’m Living in Bedrock
I love cats. They are independent and very chill. I pet them when I want to pet them. Unlike dogs, that endlessly lick your hands and face off until you play, walk, or pet them.
Also, LOLcats are amazing.
I like cats as long as I don’t have to look after one. Some friends have a cat which they have had since a couple of weeks old and I have seen it grow up and is now part of the family.
It amazes me how people get so attached to their cats and pets in general. Indeed, here in England the English are noted for how much they care and look after their pets especially dogs.
Some people look after their cats and dogs better than their own children. Go figure that out…
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Talking of cats and dogs, does anyone know where the phrase “raining cats and dogs” comes from?!
arvind’s last blog post..7 Tips to Stop Losing an Hour of your time EVERY Day
Well Arvind….
According to the site - http://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/raining%20cats%20and%20dogs.html
They conclude that:
The first appearance of the currently used version is in Jonathan Swift’s A Complete Collection of Polite and Ingenious Conversation in 1738:
“I know Sir John will go, though he was sure it would rain cats and dogs”.
The fact that Swift had alluded to the streets flowing with dead cats and dogs some years earlier and now used ‘rain cats and dogs’ explicitly is good evidence that poor sanitation was the source of the phrase as we now use it.
Hmmmm - so from this it means cats and dogs flowing downhill during floods (heavy rain) rather than the literally meaning - they are swept up by it - is this FUR enough?
Fur enough, Jim
arvind’s last blog post..7 Tips to Stop Losing an Hour of your time EVERY Day
probably biblical! they had all sorts raining down on them - bet they hadn’t wished for drought now though.
Purple13’s last blog post..Photo Gifts make Publisher sit up and notice for Dubai Novelists
Cats are better than dogs, they relieve themselves in a hygienic manner, do not eat their own faeces (or others’ for that matter) and then try and lick your face.
Depends what you call hygenic - they make an attempt at cover up - but don’t always succeed. Dog poo is easier to spot when you are gardening - unless the dog has the squits. And generally you can take dogs somewhere else to poo.
The cat we had used to scent her territory - and that included the garage. It stank. Fortunately it was because other cats were coming into the garage. Once we stopped that, she stopped spraying.
With you on eating the poo though - but cats do lick their bums.
hey Emma and fishman
Agree about the cats.. I love cats and dogs and have both…
at the moment I have 6 cats yep mum cat had 4 kittens… still dont know HOw( yes I know HOW) but she was kept away fromall males inside the house.. didnt get out, she was kept away from my boy cat.. seperate rooms the whole bit…. no escapes at all and still she had kittens.. I now have to drive 3 hours to the closest pet shop…..
one of the kittens we lost… it wouldnt feed .. dont know what happened even did the eye dropper thing… a studied showed that people who have cats and or dogs are calmer, have lower blood pressure etc… also an infected wound if a cat cleans it, it clears up faster than antibiotics…. dont know about that though… My cats are cool though they kill any mice… or rats… and yes they bring them home to show us… even had the tom catch a snake… so they do provide a service…. the sooking and attention is mostly when it is cold… my cats climb under the blankets and so does my girl dog… which isnt to bad in winter keeps the feet warm… hehehhehe
if you put lemon juice in a spray bottle and spray it around the area sprayed in by the cat… it will usually stop it… they also hate lavender…..
My older dog started to use the litter tray…. not happy at all… I think he thought the cats use it and it is good…
the dogs… eat poo.. yes…. not fussy either…. cats, roos, possums, chicken… it doesnt matter….. it is so gross…
Hard to stop but they stopped doing at least while we are watching…got sick of getting yelled at I think….
ooo yuk!
Ah, but did you know that it’s safer to kiss a dog than a human? The bacteria in the mouth of a dog are species specific.
Empress Nightshade’s last blog post..The Flintstones Pushed Drugs and Tobacco
My grandfather (a GREAT man) once told me, “Never trust a man who doesn’t like dogs”.
I never thought to ask him about cats! But knowing my G-pa he’d have probably said, “If it mattered, someone would come up with something!”
In my present marriage, I could have saved myself a load of trouble if I’d just listened to G-Pa. I swear, I didn’t really believe that His Grace loathed dogs as much as he does. I thought it was an act.
.::sighs::.
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Rufus, you are so right!!!
My mum swears by it! Every time I’ve got involved with someone, her first question is exactly that. And so far she has always been right.
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I’m a cat lover Empress,always had a cat or two in the family since childhood,all of them with different personalities.I had a cat when i was a kid called “Badger”,he used to catch loads of stuff because we lived out in the sticks! His prize catch was a mole…how many people have seen a mole in the flesh!?
BO - one of my favourite memories of my Grandad was him showing me a mole he had caught in his greenhouse. It was dead, but he didn’t let that stop him showing it to us (Yorkshire stock). I must have been about 5. He showed us how it’s fur was smooth whichever way you stroked it.
Why do Grandad’s do that,mine used to keep a can of worms for us to see!
Hi Empress - I wouldn’t say I’m really a cat lover, but our family has had pets since I was born - cats and dogs. I also had mice when I was younger.
What I like about cats is that they are small enough to have on your lap and stroke them - which when feeling low can be quite therapeutic. The ones that aren’t lazy do catch mice that hang around outside. One of my parents cats once got a rat, which is quite a feat. Having said that - if you don’t get them a scratch post or equivalent, they ruin furniture. Didn’t have these fluffy white ones - Heinz 57 variety.
Mike and I had one cat - now dead - she was called Stinky Minky (rescue cat called Minky, we didn’t like that name). She was very helpful (not) , and used to bring us dead frogs and leave them on the doorstep. I think the subconscious reason we got her was as a child substitute of sorts. At the time we had decided that we weren’t going to have children.
We are not too daft about our animals though - when she got old, she developed a lump (probably cancer) - the vet assumed we would pay lots of money to have a biopsy done, then if it was, an operation to remove the cancer, and any drugs that went with that. We didn’t - just paid for the pills to ensure she wasn’t in pain. she lasted a few more weeks. Slightly different for the dog though - we have pet insurance that would pay for the vet bills.
Oh yeah - nearly forgot. I went to a lecture about Feral cats once - quite interesting. Female cats ’sleep around’ - mate multiple times in a night. I have a distant memory (or did I imagine it) that Male cats have ’spikes’ on their penis.
Spikes!
You serious?
No wonder they lick their wounds…
I heard that too….. freaky…
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Yes - just been to check:
Whole male cats have barbed penises (much like a fishhook), and upon withdrawal, the female cat will often scream (whether from ecstasy or pain is questionable). It is also believed that the barbed penis stimulates ovulation.
A litter can also contain kittens from more than one male
Um…..
I think I’ll speak for females — human, cat or otherwise and say…YES, they are screaming from pain!
Empress Nightshade’s last blog post..The Flintstones Pushed Drugs and Tobacco
Cats are cute sometimes and bad other times..
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To me, they are cute when they are someone else’s.
Whenever my teenage son sees a cat, whether in person, on a photo or on TV, he gets this high pitch tone in his voice and says, “Oooooh, that’s so cute!” From his 6′2″, 275 pound body comes these words just dripping with gooey sweetness that makes me turn my head and leave the room.
Empress Nightshade’s last blog post..The Flintstones Pushed Drugs and Tobacco
I’m with Bo on this obviously, I’m a founder of the Cat Appreciation Society. There has always been massive heartbreak in our family when one dies but the pleasure they bring whilst they are alive is worth the pain.
I was taught in business that people are either like cats or dogs. Some people constantly want to please (dogs) and others are aloof (cats) and you need to adapt your personality accordingly when you are trying to engage them. It really works.
Lib’s last blog post..GO! Smell the cigar smoke!
Lib,
Maybe that’s it! I’m more of a dog. No jokes, please
Empress Nightshade’s last blog post..The Flintstones Pushed Drugs and Tobacco
Not a cat fan - lazy, solipsistic b*stards.
Not big on dogs, though ironically (?) am keen on dogging. Go figure.
We think alike on this. Now, I’m off to go look up ’solipsistic.’
Empress Nightshade’s last blog post..The Flintstones Pushed Drugs and Tobacco
great - another dogging fan.
SOLIPSISTIC ~ Extreme preoccupation with and indulgence of one’s feelings, desires, etc.; egoistic self-absorption.
SELFISH, in another word. Gotcha! Keep ‘em coming, O’DB.
Empress Nightshade’s last blog post..The Flintstones Pushed Drugs and Tobacco
Hi Empress, I can’t say I love cats although I do prefer them to dogs. I have only ever lived with a couple of cats once for a few years and what I liked about them was that they would snuggle up on the couch when watching TV and the fact that I didn’t have to walk them was even more appealing.
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It’s really hard for anything to sit next to me with my 6′2″, 275lb teenager always up under me. The kid should be playing football and not be under his mommie.
Empress Nightshade’s last blog post..I’m Living in Bedrock